Just complimenting the drink – what about the drinker? When tea drunks give you the thumbs up, you should be happy for the rest of the week. A few thoughts on what it might sound and look like.
Anyone with a command of a basic “hello” in Chinese can testify, one gets praised for next to zero ability of the language with quite lavish compliments in some places. Shanghai being a definite exception to the rule. But apart from the few places flooded with foreigners fluent in mandarin – one gets inundated with rather over the top remarks without a lick of Chinese. I mean, can you imagine anyone calling your French perfect after airing a mediocre bonjour?
Not that people with a very minimal command of the language would understand the sweet talk but it is offered up none the less. It is a way of giving honour to the person at hand and thus -thanks to the law of karma – getting some back in return. Win-win. As for myself, I have grown completely immune to all comments about my Chinese – to a point I probably lose out on a lot of advice I should be picking up on. Oh well.
However – there is a breed of compliments that tug at my heart strings the moment they are aired leaving me utterly floored with gratitude. They go something like this:
In any other context these words would be dubious to say the least – but when said by seasoned tea drunks – what can I say? I am totally taken by their lip service.
And that’s what it really is – lip service spurred on by the moment, pleasantries exchanged over a good brew. And yet, the coffee drinking world could maybe learn something from this: we have always overflowing praise for the coffee beans at hand, and maybe even a few generous adjectives for the barista or coffee machine… but what about your fellow drinkers at the table? How much do you enjoy their company and how to express that? Mind you, coffee in most cases ends up being a very personal experience. Only one person drinks that very espresso at any given moment. Next person in line gets the next individual coffee. But with tea, all at hand share the same brew at the same time. Suddenly, your fellow drinker’s ability to vocalise what you’re tasting makes a huge difference to the experience. Suddenly company matters way beyond the looks or smart conversation they are able to hold. Tea drunks will let you know if you are considered worthy of a next time by complementing your drinking.
Compliments can be taken even further than that. You know you have gone beyond just regular drinking company when you are designated your own cup, which only you are entitled to drink from. Then you have without a question entered the realm of true 茶友 (the characters being: tea plus friendship/friend) A wish for you to be a more constant feature in this host’s tea cosmos has been uttered in the form of a humble cup. Think about it – how much of a regular would you need to be at the local cafe to have your own personal cup? One wonders.
The one teadealer who has designated me this honour of having my own cup is Baoming. His shop is a mess; it looks more like a warehouse with things strewn around, like a careless whisper, rather than a shop. And yet, he has a method to his madness. He knows where most of his things are; how he finds them I have no idea, but he does. After some digging around he comes up with unbelievable tea treasures from decades ago. And he gets excited about them – I have great affection for him and his knowledge. His palate is impeccable and demanding. He seems to still want things from his tea. This in itself is admirable, since many tea merchants don’t seem to share that mind-set. Drinkers do, but for the shopkeeper to be thinking that way… Thumbs up.
Apart from his warehouse-like surroundings, Baoming also has plenty of random people floating in and out of his daily life. His shop is almost like a reception hall for chance encounters. Among all that: to be appointed my own cup felt almost even more meaningful. I am even more honoured that he knows exactly where he keeps it, and if he knows I am coming has it washed and ready to go by the time I step into his scented mess. And if Baoming drops any compliments, I am sure to listen more carefully. When tea comradery goes to the point of having your own cup at a person’s house or shop – those words are no longer meaningless chitchat. Pay attention. The law of karma has just been laid aside and the laws of friendship are at play. 个人杯* all the way!
* gèrénbēi, personal cup
